Wednesday, December 01, 2010

The Comfort of Strangers

The door opened and she stood in the doorway. Maybe she had just woken up; her eyelids were heavy and her lips were dark and moist. Almost bruised. She was a good looking dame and I couldn't help but stare.

"Vera?" I asked, holding the envelope out in one hand. An invitation for her to take it from me.

She smiled and tilted her head slightly, sizing me up. Then she turned away from the open door and, ignoring my outstretched hand entirely, walked slowly back into the house. I had a clear view of her retreating back but my eyes were drawn further down to the mesmerising sway of her hips.

"You had better come in" she said over her shoulder. She held a wineglass carelessly in one hand; empty, I noticed.

She sounded a little drunk. 

I stepped in and closed the door behind me.

I swear this is *exactly* what happened!

More or less. Of course 'Vera' isn't her real name but I bet you already knew that.

Anyway, it started out as a run-of-the-mill document service job. Vera's (soon to be ex-) husband had filed for divorce and I had to deliver the good news.

The house was like a little gingerbread cottage. All the hedges were neatly trimmed, the lawn was immaculate; someone was more than a little house-proud.

She didn't answer the door right away and, in fact, I thought that no-one was home and was about to leave when I heard movement. Then the door opened and Vera was standing in front of me as per above description.

More or less.

Only once I was inside the house and standing in her lounge did Vera think of asking to see my identification. A bit late for that, Vera, if I had something nefarious in mind.

But then she told me that she was all alone and had been drinking!

Seriously Vera, are you hitting on me? I mean, I *do* like them drunk and vulnerable but...

I guess you are just lucky that I'm the consummate professional that I am.

Sensing that I could not be swayed from my task by a pretty face, Vera decided that she was not going to sign the Acknowledgment of Service. She even tried to give back the documents but I would not accept them and firmly told her that whether she signed the Acknowledgment, or not, the documents had still been legally served upon her.

Then Vera stated she would call her lawyer in the morning and then would call me later to come around and pick up the completed Acknowledgment if her lawyer told her it was okay to sign.

Vera, is that just an excuse to have me come around again?

Maybe tomorrow I'll have a shave first. Should I bring a bottle of wine?

1 comment:

  1. Vera, the tart, was not as vulnerable as I would have liked when she had me come over again.

    Firstly, it was around 10am (surely 10pm would have been more appropriate) and she was sober.


    Just can't read those women correctly...